If you suffer from a chronic illness, I am sure you’re familiar with the question…’will I ever get better?‘ I have asked myself this question many times over the years I’ve been poorly.
POTS has changed my life completely – I am so restricted now; even the simplest of things are a challenge – showering, talking on the phone, reading, sitting upright etc. I have learnt to accept that this is the way my life is going to be for a little while, but I always have hope that I will recover to a degree where I can still live my life. I had an appointment last week that was disappointing – I am not responding as we’d have liked to the medication used to alleviate POTS symptoms. My consultant does’t seem as confident as he was when I first saw him, when he said he was ‘quietly confident that he could improve my quality of life significantly’. But I guess thats before he discovered how complicated I am – a medical mystery as others have called me. We discussed that potentially I may have something coinciding with the POTS such as Lyme or ME. Last week was a tough one as I lost a little bit of hope. Not all of it, but a little. I am worried that it is going to be a longer and more complicated road that I thought to improve my health. But I will do whatever it takes to beat my illness and try never to loose hope. Hope is such a powerful tool; it drives us forward and it allows us to have a positive perspective of the future. It keeps us going. I am going to spend this week trying to regain that little bit of hope back.